Comfort Zone

It has been a fun, busy, entirely strange month since we got back from Kenya for a whole host of reasons I might talk about later. But today I want to talk about how when life is bizarre and I am a roughly 7000 miles away from my comfort zone (according to Google Maps), why I feel right at home. And basically, the reason is this picture.

There are a few pictures from the wedding that just immediately transport me back to certain moments and feelings. The photo above is one of them.

Just before this photo was taken I was waiting in the church basement for the wedding to start. I felt so nervous, knowing that I was about to do something I had thought about for my entire life and if I really stopped to think about it, I would just burst into a million pieces. So I was trying not to think about it.

Then the music started and I thought, “Hey, that’s our wedding song! Wait a second, that’s because this IS our wedding! Holy crap… I’m about to get married… Oh my God! Wait, the bridesmaids are walking down the aisle! Somebody stop them! I’m not ready for this! Oh shitake mushroom, there goes Jenny! I think that means I’m next! Holy crap, Dad is walking… wait, I’m walking too!!! Why are my feet moving? MAHHHH! Oh wow, look at all those people! Oh, I love all these people! Wait, wait, focus. Do not fall! Look pretty! People are taking pictures of you! Oh no, ugly cry coming on… DO NOT CRY!”

And then, I saw John standing at the end of the aisle. And I could breathe again. I pretty much fell into this hug and suddenly felt so, so right. I was home.

What I love about being married to John is that the feeling of being at home wherever he is does not go away. It’s like a comfort zone better than a nice apartment on Capitol Hill filled with air conditioning, hot water, and freshly baked brownies that I can just take along with me wherever I go. I can be at home in Belize or Egypt or Texas or South Sudan, because he is there. For someone who loves to travel (and to not always superbly comfortable places!), but hates to leave people I love, having John as a life-long companion is the best gift I could ask for.

-Stephanie

Photo courtesy of Melissa Blackall